The Evolution of Relationships

As I get older, the relationships I have with those around me become more powerful and deeper than those of my younger years. I’ll start with my family. Growing up there were times I figured I knew what was best for me and didn’t appreciate the guidance that was given to me. I sometimes felt the decisions made by my parents were purely selfish or in an attempt to keep me from experiencing life. Now looking back, I smile, shake my head a little bit, and feel so grateful for the “guidance” they bestowed upon me. Like the time they forbid me from bringing over the guy that was once featured on America’s Most Wanted, or when they nailed my window shut so I couldn’t sneak out…yes, now I understand the restrictions they put before me.


These days, my parents don’t put restrictions on the people I see or have to remind me that I’ll be grouchy if I stay up past 10:30. I’ve learned from them. I’ve learned that it’s possible to do anything you want to do, if you set your mind to it. I’ve learned that life isn’t fair, but no one said it was going to be. And I’ve learned that your family will always love you, no matter what you do. They are absolutely amazing people…from my momma making sure my lunch is packed and ready to go each and everyday before work, to my poppa surprising Scott and I with a plate of fresh smoked ribs in the evening. I value them more each day and I could never thank them enough for the loving, great people they are and instilling those values in me.

Sisters have a unique bond that can’t be replicated. When I was little my sister was there to play with me, bite my arms when mom wasn’t looking, and participate in the Christmas morning scavenger hunt with me. She was my built in playmate. On family vacations, my sister was the one that built sand castles with me or walk me to the city pool during the long, hot days of summer. While our 3 year age difference seemed like decades during the high school years, as we’ve gotten older the age gap has closed. We’ve watched each other go through the ups and downs of life and have managed to emerge tighter. She’s always quick with a joke but brutally honest when she needs to be. She gives everything she has to those she loves. She can be so strong but can get hurt by the words and actions of others. I wouldn’t change a thing about her silly, crazy, sometimes fashion-lacking ways. (Kidding cckins) I’ve even forgiven her for telling me there was an egg in my forehead (when I was younger) that she needed to crack. I would let her hit me in the forehead until she felt the egg was cracked.

Photo by the talented Nicole Neff

Scott Andrew. My previous posts have described the earth shattering effect this man has had on my life. Our relationship has taught me about patience, compromise, and loving someone so intensely that sometimes you think you may burst. Our relationship has made me happier and healthier. It’s also made me realize the importance of all relationships, not just ours. He encourages me to spend time with my family and girlfriends. He encourages me to build those relationships and work on the issues that sometimes arise. He stresses that no relationship is worth throwing away and to do everything possible to preserve friendships with those around me. His wisdom is so deep that I know I will continue to be amazed by him 50 years from now as we sit at a local church hall playing BINGO eating Tums.

Girlfriends. Growing up, everyone has that childhood “best friend.” The friend that always went to the mall with you on a Friday night followed by a slumber party at their house. You made promises to be best friends forever and be Maid of Honor in one another’s wedding.

Unfortunately those childhood dreams change and don’t last past the walls of high school. You start meeting new people and that’s when the life experiences begin. As we get older, parents pass away, people get engaged, babies are born, and divorces happen. Through these life experiences, we see who our friends are. We see the people that stick by our side when life isn’t perfect. We lean on one another’s shoulders and give much needed hugs on those long days. These friends make you laugh at just the perfect time, sometimes for no reason at all. I value these people that I call my friends. These strong, intelligent, beautiful women that in this busy adventure of life make time to have me be a part of theirs. To those women…Thank you!

My challenge to you let those in your life know you appreciate them. Let them know you value their relationship and you’re glad to experience this life with them. Family and Friends are what makes this experience worthwhile…and it is very worthwhile.